Today turned out pretty well. I got up at 5:30 a.m., out the door by 6:30 a.m., got to UCLA at 10:00 a.m.. It's a long commute to say the least. But by taking the train and bus, I didn't have to deal with traffic, and I approached it like a new adventure. As it stands right now, I would have to be in L.A. twice a week for classes. But today was draining, it's not a hop skip and a jump away from home. That's where the good news comes in: while I'm talking to my advisor, he asks me if I had received any fellowships. I said no, not to my knowledge. He thought that was odd, considering my GPA, and seemed to recall seeing my name on a list. I went upstairs and spoke to the guy who gives out the money, and he had a copy of a letter in my file that had a typo in the address. Obviously, I never got it. The important parts of the letter went something like this: Fellowship - $21,000 One Quarter T.A. - $4,500 Fees - $4,500 Non-Resident Tuition - $11,000 So yeah, not only were they willing to pay for my tuition and non-resident tuition (they thought I was a Florida resident), they were going to pay me $4,500 for twelve weeks of being a T.A. and the kicker is the $21,000 fellowship - they cut you a check once a quarter. The money is yours, for expenses, for just being a wonderful person they want to keep at their school. This would certainly pay for any rent, bills, groceries, etc. And if I can find a relatively cheap place, I can put some money towards my undergrad loans. Living close to campus would most definitely make my life easier as far as writing my thesis goes too. Slight problem: I never got the letter, so they assumed I wasn't accepting the award. The man I spoke to said he was very confident that they could still honor the award, considering that I don't need the non-resident tuition. But I won't know until Monday or Tuesday. So I'm crossing my fingers on this one. I was going to go no matter what, after I spent the last few months debating whether it was a good idea to take out more loans to reach my goal of getting my masters, and eventually Ph.D. Maybe this is what I get for realizing that I would make my goals a reality whether it came at a cost or not. It's funny that I happen to find out about this money after I've decided not to go for financial reasons, then decided that was a bad excuse, that it would be worth it in the long run, despite the costs in the present tense. And now it might end up being free! It kind of made me think though; the letter was dated in March, and if I had known then the amount of the award, I would have certainly jumped at it, and all of my fears and uncertainties about the future would have been laid to rest. Maybe then I wouldn't have been so anxious to get home and try to figure things out, maybe I would have stayed in Miami and gone on tour. I just kind of chuckle when I realize what the knowledge of this would have made my summer like. I spent all of June convinced I couldn't afford grad school, looking for a job, and being frustrated when I didn't find anything. I sure wish I would have known about this earlier, because I like it when things like that happen, I like the security of fincancial stability. It's still not set in stone, but if I get the fellowship, I'll be in a frenzy to move to L.A. I'm not worried by the thought this time, and that's nice. I have a really nice feeling right now, and I hope this doesn't fall through. If it does, I think it will make the thought of that commute, and being broke, and taking out a loan that much harder, knowing that the money was there for me. Deliriously tired, going to dreamland. Listening: Ester Drang |